Off To Camp

I am off to Ethelonter V for the whole of this upcoming week. Drop me an SMS or call me if things are urgent.

I want to say I hate going away from home because of where I am going. I want to say I do not want to step out of my comfort zone because where I am going is not a place which brings comfort to me. I want to say I want the camp to end soon and I want to go out with my friends because my friends are far, far better than the people in camp.

Some people are very weird and obsessed. So much so I want to puke.

One week of acting high and one week of disgust. I can hold it.

I Am Sadistic

Things are bound to go awry at the last minute. Look at what has been happening and look at how irate people are because of how some management handle stuff.

Sometimes, people need to realise that they are not perfect, no matter how their horoscopes say they are. Sometimes, people need to know that things will not go as they expect because their events involve humans and humans are changing creatures. Sometimes, people need to learn that they have to give and take because we won't just keep giving and they can't keep receiving.

Yeah, I am sadistic. I like to see how others, by the others I mean those who have been ill-treating me, are facing trouble. Not exactly like but I would want them to see how they are not always correct and how they are infuriating the people whom they seek help from. This isn't the way to managing people and displaying your less-than-able leadership. I am not sure I can do a better job but from where I am standing, I can see that there is something very wrong with the way things are done. I am glad to see that, so at least next time I will not repeat what is wrong if I ever get a chance to. If these things do not turn out well, blame yourselves the leaders, because I don't see who else you have as your scapegoats. I am sadistic, remember? I will be smirking behind all of you because you all made me do it. Too much of torturing people won't do you or others any good.

This is a sinister post, topped with the most evil laughs and most unbelievable words from me.

Philosophy

Hui Fang says I can blog about Philosophy and I am so going to do it. Simply, what is my philosophy? Why do I always do things which seem warped to others? Is there something wrong with my philosophy or is everyone entitled to his/her own set of thinking and judgement towards things and situations?

In my opinion, we can all do what we like so long as we do not hurt others. Well, even if we do hurt others in the process knowingly or unknowingly, an apology should be offered. Virgos find it hard to say sorry? I need to check up on that because I myself am not very sure.

My Philosophy revolves very much about myself, which means I probably have these - Chauvinism, Egotism and Narcissism. I have been told so many times by different people I do not behave like a girl, so it won't come as a surprise if I say I practise Chauvinism. My ego has been greatly suppressed since I entered University and I cannot seem to find my way back to it. Hopefully I will be able to get it back when next semester starts. Narcissism is the least possible thing I thought I will be heading towards but maybe I have that kind of thinking too. I don't really love myself a lot but I just want to defend myself, from all sorts of things which may or may not happen. I don't want to see myself hurt so I defend myself greatly. This is probably the reason why I only appear as I am. To know me through and through, friends have to break my defences. I am D for defensive, direct and domineering. Don't remind me of my D personality again.

Because many ideas differ so people cannot click, because many beliefs differ so the Human Chemistry doesn't work and because many values and thoughts towards life differ so people dislike one another. Philosophy is such an interesting topic. I will drive further into Philosophy and my takes on life some other day.

歌曲: 终结孤单 歌手: 五月天 专辑: Final Home 当我们混

约你你说不来 来了你又不high 大家开开心心出来玩 你却埋头吃饭 如果你的孤单 只是你的习惯 你就把你自己锁起来 实在是太不应该 心情好心情坏 怎么开始怎么办 你有的不爽 让我来分担 Everything gonna be alright Tomorrow will be fine 太阳依然灿烂 地球继续转 有我的陪伴 你再也不孤单 有我的陪伴 一起终结孤单 卫冕者接受挑战 难免也会失败 人生像一场比赛 还是要保持乐观 请你把头抬起来 帮你把勇气装满 有我这样完美的朋友 high不high 当然很high 啦 嘿

Nothingness And Emptiness Again

Nowadays I really have very few things to blog about. Still on the emptiness and nothingness mode I think.

Many people are very troublesome and full of weird ideas. Many people are expecting too much and are too much. Next time I shall go find out more about the thing I am signing up for before making such a rash and irrational decision again.

Argh! I don't want school to start anytime soon and I want my life back!

Human Chemistry

How does human chemistry work? Why do some people naturally come under the 酒逢知己千杯少 category and others just have to fall in that 话不投机半句多 category?

I hate being the Key Councilor of Ethelonther V. I am saying this very blatantly. At least all these pre-camp stuff are tiring me out so much I hate myself for being cheated into this bad job. I don't understand why I am being blamed for the bad chemistry in my group. These things cannot be controlled by a mortal and I am very much not Buddha.

It's extremely unfair to keep asking me act as if I am a hysterically enthusiastic lunatic who has just been unleashed and bring on this group which seems so dead. If the people can't be high-ed up, I don't see why I should be blamed for this bad situation. I hope the people up there can see that I have been doing my best since the Councilor Briefing and even before that. They can keep their praises to themselves, they can save me from all their thanks to themselves as well, just don't start comparing my group with other groups, just don't begin reprimanding me for the lack of cohesion in my group, just don't push the entire responsibility of a badly bonded group on the Key Councilor. It just isn't fair.

The ability to click with certain people is based on many things. Horoscope, fate, the existence of common topics and interests, character, the chat-ability of people and their willingness to share their stories. If only one of two of the above are present, I doubt things are going to work out. Personally, I don't think anybody is to be blamed for the lack of ability to click with other people because it is all predestined by Heaven that some people are to be more than friends and some are just to be mere acquaintances.

For me, I don't in the least think I am less street-smart than an average person. At least when I go out with other people, I try my best to blend in and mingle. So stop blaming me if you don't see my efforts in bringing my group together. Blame the group members for their lack of time, blame the group members for their lack of cooperation towards this group, blame the In-Charge for putting such un-enthusiastic members in the same group, blame everyone else but the one who has put in so much effort she is tired of all this crap.

Once again, I do hope during the main camp itself, I can be happier being the Key Councilor of Mokuze than I am now. I reckon it's easy because I am really very upset at the moment. I never thought this can be so sucky.

So Ill

Ill. Fever, runny nose, cough, bad throat. Goodness. Get well soon.

Jokes From PC Show 2008

These really happened. Have a good laugh.

Customer: What other freebies do I get besides the mouse?
Me: Well, I can throw in a cat for you.

Customer: What Furbies do I get with this deal?
Me: =___=

Customer: Do you give away free mice?
Me: =___=

Customer: Can I get another free wired mouse besides this bluetooth one?
Me: One for each hand?

Customer: I would like to get one more monitor screen besides the one which is coming together with the desktop.
Me: One for each eye?

Me: I'll give you a webcam for every desktop you purchase.
Customer: Is it a logistic webcam?
Me: It's a Logitech webcam. =___=

Customer: *points to some rival brochure* Which is a better deal? Yours or theirs?
Me: Theirs, go buy from them.

Customer: Does this laptop come with a carrying case?
Me: Yes, it does.
2 weeks later...
Customer: Where is my carrying case?!?!

Customer: Do I get a backpack as well as a carrying case at this additional cost?
Me: Yes, you do.
2 weeks later...
Customer: I see my backpack but where is my carrying case?!?!

PC Show 2008

Even before the end of the PC show, I knew it was a good and new experience for me. Standing for 9 hours straight, talking non-stop, no time for lunch or dinner, no time for toilet breaks, incessant complains from customers, irritating and unreasonable requests for better and free stuff and not to forget, some sulky, unhelpful colleagues who either give you a black face or snatch your deals from you directly or indirectly.

Of course, I don't deny that I have learnt customer service from this show and how to put on a (fake) smile even things get on your nerves. Whacking on things which may not be true, lots of sales talk, a great deal of lying and hypocritism, keeping up to whatever crap that is re-newed everyday, being willing to ask for help and advice (I am trying to steer back to the positive side), putting in your heart into each deal for the benefit of your customers and talking without a conscience.

It is indeed a good learning platform for me. And many thanks to all my friends who came down to visit me - Gladys, Samantha, Wenxian, Pei Fen, Jie Hui, Hui Fang, Vanessa and Fatima. Yucks, Jinhong came to PC Show but didn't come visit me.

Anger Management

I think anger gets the better of me sometimes, especially in the case of the previous post. The vulgar version of it really doesn't sound nice but I cannot help it. When I get too infuriated, they just come naturally.

Sometimes all I need are methods to shut others up. I shall try sarcasm, lying and crapping for a start. I might be able to lessen the antagonisation, if there is ever such a word.

I really tolerated too much from that woman. I don't think I need to give her more respect than she gives me. Anger management has its limits too. Don't go overboard. And I've blocked her on MSN. It's a forever thing.

Scolding - The Rational Version

This is the rational, logical version of my scolding of a fellow CCA-mate. I was very kind at that point in time, though I very much wanted to scold her back. I have managed to restrain my anger and not refuke because I respect her as a senior. But it seems that I have misplaced my respect, she does not deserve it at all. This will be a very peaceful post about my stand and opinion on this entire matter. The real scolding is done at http://www.guaigia.wordpress.com/, password from me upon request via MSN, call, e-mail, SMS, whatever.

First and foremost, I do not see what is wrong with hanging around one close friend, especially if she is the only familiar face I see among many others. I mean it isn't a sin or a crime. What isn't correct? Pardon me for my lack of knowledge but I would really like to know what exactly is wrong with me hanging out with my friend. Oh, I sort of remember her saying it's because I don't seem to be able to mingle well with others and more importantly those from my group. I cannot interact with them well? Interesting, very interesting. I need social networking skills? Extremely ironical, imagine her saying that, and making two enemies as a result. Who needs the social networking skills more? I am totally dumbfounded.

Secondly, I felt cheated into this job which I am undertaking. It is pay-less, and I do not mind a bit about this fact because I am willing to do voluntary work. But can she not take advantage of this point and literally trick and cheat people into tasks like that? I am very disappointed in what she has done. Little did I know that this job entails so much, I wasn't even informed when I took it up, thanks to the lack of courtesy on the part of her. She did not even try to let me know what is packaged behind this job. Let me briefly explain what I had to do, which I never imagined I would need to. My task emcompasses paying almost $250 out of my own pocket first for some reason or another, and I haven't collected back the full sum from my group, organising some social networking gathering for my group because we are such a bunch of intellectual people we can communicate with each other without opening our mouths, attend Buddha knows how many zillion trials and be subjected to a whole lot of abuse, be it verbal or physical, be restricted to the friends I can hang out with and a lot more. I haven't seen a worse off In-Charge. She should at least tell me what I would be expecting and not hide all the details until I see them for myself, just so she can hand in a perfect scoresheet to her boss saying, "Yes, I have found a person for the job."

She asked my friend not to look for a job this holidays due to the high commitment required in this project and what she does she do on the other hand? She is working and goes MIA for some trials. She recommends a job to another guy provided he agrees to be part of her scoresheet. How despicable, much to my disgust. The way she acts and carries herself, the way she treat different people differently, utterly disappointing. We were her counterparts, and she was nice to us. Making use of this I-do-know-you-before-this advantage and ill-treating us, this really isn't what a senior should do. This is double standard. Or is it because he is a guy that she is treating him differently? Fine, and the other girls with boyfriends hanging around them, I see that she treats them differently too. Oh please, she should go tell them not to hang around their boyfriends too much and get to know more people.

And is she going to be a disciplinarian or the next Hitler or something? We are not supposed to talk during certain times of the day because we need to listen. Hilarious, it doesn't mean that if she cannot multi-task, we cannot too. We are very much able humans and are capable of multi-tasking. And we gathered as much information as those who weren't talking. She can come ask me who said what. And amazingly, she did not chide a single bit to the two guys who went off on the sly to get drinks. How unfair. As far as I am concerned, I did nothing wrong and should not be reprimanded by her at all.

Disappointed in us? Oh it comes as a surprise to me if I were to say I weren't disappointed in her. She knows roughly how my character works. So expect what she can expect of me. I know roughly know how her personality sucks. So I expect what I can expect of her.

Why don't she go and scold the assistant? Is it because he is a guy? Or maybe some will say she has scolded him, just that I do not know. Fine. But commitment wise, I do not see how less committed I am to this project than the assistants. But what do I get in return? I am not expecting monetary returns, in fact, I have estimated to have spent at least $100 in the execution of this project. The least I could wish for is for people like her to appreaciate what we have done and not scold us unnecessarily or without proper rhyme or reason. There isn't anything she should complain about. We are already doing our best for her, what more does she want?

Her fellow In-Charge is not complaining a thing to us, maybe because we aren't under her wing. Her fellow In-Charge only mentioned, "There should not be anything we need to tell you. If there is, I'll message." And spare me if I need to compare, she had the decency to come and reprimand us. I mean who does she think she is? Even my close friends don't come and say such nasty things to me. If they did, they would have put it in such a polite manner I would gladly accept and change. And if I disagreed, I would rebute. In this case, I very much want to hit her hard back using words but I controlled. It isn't a matter of whether I want a quarrel. I just don't want to spoil an amicable acquaintanceship. It's her, I seriously don't know why she had to say such hurting words which do nothing but auto-generates two foes.

There is nothing to be heart-painful about, go check for heart diseases if she is still facing the same problems. There is nothing I can do to resolve her heart-ache, nor can she do a thing to reduce my resentment for her. The next time I see her, I will still hang out with my friend not only because I don't see anything wrong with it, but also because it's a form of rebellion. And yes, I will put on a fake smile for her to see, so that she doesn't realise the virtual knife I feel like stabbing into her painful heart.

Even a person who is not there at the point in time believes that I could have just talked to my friend ONLY and neglected the many others. Even a Primary School kid can tell how unreasonable she was. It's high time for her to reflect on her behaviour and demeanours.

It's usually the guys who irate me because I can accept female flaws more easily that male ones. But I am flaggergasted myself, how this woman can antagonise me, so much more than a male.

*FED UP*

Who do you think you are? What are you trying to say? Who are you targeting? What on earth is the point you are driving across? *FED UP* To the many people out there, if you don't know me, well or long enough, don't pretend so and be rude. I don't appreciate such imbecile attitude.

I remind myself of this song because.

歌曲: 我们的故事 歌手: Tension 专辑: Tension

在你左右 还有多久 怎么样才能让时间倒流 每一分每一秒都珍重 握紧的手 不愿放松 十点半的飞机它在等候 不要再让自己的眼泪流 我必须要走 要记得 我们的故事真难忘 太多的回忆和希望 不管它有多疯狂 我愿意一生收藏 我们的故事不能忘 太多的情节要发展 不要放弃 因为有一天缘份会继续 在你左右 还有多久 怎么样才能让时间倒流 每一分每一秒都珍重 握紧的手 不愿放松 十点半的飞机它在等候 不要再让自己的眼泪流 我必须要走 要记得 我们的故事真难忘 太多的回忆和希望 不管它有多疯狂 我愿意一生收藏 我们的故事不能忘 太多的情节要发展 不要放弃 因为有一天缘份会继续 我知道你寂寞一个人确实好难 过思念是一种痛 没有你叫我怎么活 身边充满诱惑 不坚定就容易犯错 你是否能看见未来的收获 你愿意在耐心等候 我们的故事真难忘 太多的回忆和希望 不管它有多疯狂 我愿意一生收藏 我们的故事不能忘 太多的情节要发展 不要放弃 因为有一天缘份会继续 让我们一起演完