Scolding - The Rational Version

This is the rational, logical version of my scolding of a fellow CCA-mate. I was very kind at that point in time, though I very much wanted to scold her back. I have managed to restrain my anger and not refuke because I respect her as a senior. But it seems that I have misplaced my respect, she does not deserve it at all. This will be a very peaceful post about my stand and opinion on this entire matter. The real scolding is done at http://www.guaigia.wordpress.com/, password from me upon request via MSN, call, e-mail, SMS, whatever.

First and foremost, I do not see what is wrong with hanging around one close friend, especially if she is the only familiar face I see among many others. I mean it isn't a sin or a crime. What isn't correct? Pardon me for my lack of knowledge but I would really like to know what exactly is wrong with me hanging out with my friend. Oh, I sort of remember her saying it's because I don't seem to be able to mingle well with others and more importantly those from my group. I cannot interact with them well? Interesting, very interesting. I need social networking skills? Extremely ironical, imagine her saying that, and making two enemies as a result. Who needs the social networking skills more? I am totally dumbfounded.

Secondly, I felt cheated into this job which I am undertaking. It is pay-less, and I do not mind a bit about this fact because I am willing to do voluntary work. But can she not take advantage of this point and literally trick and cheat people into tasks like that? I am very disappointed in what she has done. Little did I know that this job entails so much, I wasn't even informed when I took it up, thanks to the lack of courtesy on the part of her. She did not even try to let me know what is packaged behind this job. Let me briefly explain what I had to do, which I never imagined I would need to. My task emcompasses paying almost $250 out of my own pocket first for some reason or another, and I haven't collected back the full sum from my group, organising some social networking gathering for my group because we are such a bunch of intellectual people we can communicate with each other without opening our mouths, attend Buddha knows how many zillion trials and be subjected to a whole lot of abuse, be it verbal or physical, be restricted to the friends I can hang out with and a lot more. I haven't seen a worse off In-Charge. She should at least tell me what I would be expecting and not hide all the details until I see them for myself, just so she can hand in a perfect scoresheet to her boss saying, "Yes, I have found a person for the job."

She asked my friend not to look for a job this holidays due to the high commitment required in this project and what she does she do on the other hand? She is working and goes MIA for some trials. She recommends a job to another guy provided he agrees to be part of her scoresheet. How despicable, much to my disgust. The way she acts and carries herself, the way she treat different people differently, utterly disappointing. We were her counterparts, and she was nice to us. Making use of this I-do-know-you-before-this advantage and ill-treating us, this really isn't what a senior should do. This is double standard. Or is it because he is a guy that she is treating him differently? Fine, and the other girls with boyfriends hanging around them, I see that she treats them differently too. Oh please, she should go tell them not to hang around their boyfriends too much and get to know more people.

And is she going to be a disciplinarian or the next Hitler or something? We are not supposed to talk during certain times of the day because we need to listen. Hilarious, it doesn't mean that if she cannot multi-task, we cannot too. We are very much able humans and are capable of multi-tasking. And we gathered as much information as those who weren't talking. She can come ask me who said what. And amazingly, she did not chide a single bit to the two guys who went off on the sly to get drinks. How unfair. As far as I am concerned, I did nothing wrong and should not be reprimanded by her at all.

Disappointed in us? Oh it comes as a surprise to me if I were to say I weren't disappointed in her. She knows roughly how my character works. So expect what she can expect of me. I know roughly know how her personality sucks. So I expect what I can expect of her.

Why don't she go and scold the assistant? Is it because he is a guy? Or maybe some will say she has scolded him, just that I do not know. Fine. But commitment wise, I do not see how less committed I am to this project than the assistants. But what do I get in return? I am not expecting monetary returns, in fact, I have estimated to have spent at least $100 in the execution of this project. The least I could wish for is for people like her to appreaciate what we have done and not scold us unnecessarily or without proper rhyme or reason. There isn't anything she should complain about. We are already doing our best for her, what more does she want?

Her fellow In-Charge is not complaining a thing to us, maybe because we aren't under her wing. Her fellow In-Charge only mentioned, "There should not be anything we need to tell you. If there is, I'll message." And spare me if I need to compare, she had the decency to come and reprimand us. I mean who does she think she is? Even my close friends don't come and say such nasty things to me. If they did, they would have put it in such a polite manner I would gladly accept and change. And if I disagreed, I would rebute. In this case, I very much want to hit her hard back using words but I controlled. It isn't a matter of whether I want a quarrel. I just don't want to spoil an amicable acquaintanceship. It's her, I seriously don't know why she had to say such hurting words which do nothing but auto-generates two foes.

There is nothing to be heart-painful about, go check for heart diseases if she is still facing the same problems. There is nothing I can do to resolve her heart-ache, nor can she do a thing to reduce my resentment for her. The next time I see her, I will still hang out with my friend not only because I don't see anything wrong with it, but also because it's a form of rebellion. And yes, I will put on a fake smile for her to see, so that she doesn't realise the virtual knife I feel like stabbing into her painful heart.

Even a person who is not there at the point in time believes that I could have just talked to my friend ONLY and neglected the many others. Even a Primary School kid can tell how unreasonable she was. It's high time for her to reflect on her behaviour and demeanours.

It's usually the guys who irate me because I can accept female flaws more easily that male ones. But I am flaggergasted myself, how this woman can antagonise me, so much more than a male.