A Nightmare

Yesterday morning, I had a nightmare, OK, a daymare. This is probably the best way to deter me from sleeping late and waking up late and lazing in bed. LOL.

This stupid, fat, ugly fellow was teaching me how to change lanes. OK, you see how traumatized, more like pissed I am with that stupid, fat, ugly fellow. Not say I'm not stupid or fat or ugly, but I still feel so irritated that I have to call that fellow, stupid, fat and ugly.

Out of nowhere, this fellow dropped me off at my primary school area. Then as I walked, I saw weird things. I saw a nun and two little nun-girls, all in orange-red robes. I have never seen any of these people before but the nun was actually ironing her robe at the void deck. At another void deck, I saw BIG BIG human photos with words around them hanging on the void deck walls. Similar to that of obituaries or carvings on graves.

I walked ahead and saw scary stuff! Around 10 coffins of different styles and patterns were neatly arranged in a row. Damn scary, there were a few coffins which are quite simple and there was this old bulky, traditional coffin which normally appears in those zombie shows. WAH, damn scary!!! I quickly walked away in the direction of my house. LOL.

Then at another block void deck, durians were on sale but they were not stacked up on racks, they were randomly placed on the ground and there were only a few durians of each type. The durians really looked dubious. Walking further up, there was a row of old people seated on white chairs eating durians. OMG, very scary, the number of old people == number of coffins? Now that I link them all up, they could be having a durian break from all that lying down. WAH! I am so scared! LOL!

Then, I think I woke up. LOL! Damn scary! And who's fault! That stupid, fat, ugly fellow's! Drop me off near those scary places! He's not even supposed to drive the car what...

Somehow, I think we're both capable in writing things we think and feel and jolt tears. Add oil, my sister.

Work Hard!

Argh! Exams are coming! And I am sleeping! ZzzzzZ. Z for sleep, that was what the artiste on TV said when no one understood which letter she was trying to say.

Yesterday, I slept from 9 pm to 10 am, please help me! Wake me up! I was saying, at 11 pm, my mom wanted to wake me up, but I fell asleep till this morning. =____= Help, help!

So I dreamt this. Hilarious enough dream. I was a nurse, so was Guai Gia #02. We were working in a hospital. GG#02 was in-charge of an impatient, aunty patient who was very irritating. The patient always took soft drinks and tidbits on bed and was found out by another random nurse. But she and GG#02 were on good terms so much so that when when the nurses had to change department or shifts, this patient wanted to arrange to change with her. I don't know how the patient could change, change her illness? LOL!

So after we went back home in a 7-seater car which GG#02 was driving. She wasn't really driving, because only her legs were controlling the brakes and accelerator. She was even in the back seat with me and I-don't-know-who-that-is. In the driver seat was another person controlling the steering wheel. Then we were avoiding the police, I mean Polis, because they were speaking Malay and the roads seemed Malaysian. We were swerving right and left with our heads bent down, eyes closed, seriously don't know why. Then, when we were bending through a corner, almost crashing into the wall, I opened my eyes and saw a wooden thing, that was my cupboard. I woke up, 6.55 am.

I went back to sleep, this time getting another weird dream. I dreamt that I was working in a Chinese medicinal hall, selling Chinese New Year festive goodies. This family, mother and children, came in, sampling all sorts of goodies but luckily they bought quite a lot too, so I didn't really cause a loss. Then I gave one of the children a sample and walked to the side-door from which a group of my friends entered. This group of friends were from University, I think. Then this one person came to me and said that Pei Fen told him some things about me and he asked why I didn't tell him. =____= Too many things going on and making me confused, LOL! Pei Fen wasn't even close to this person. Why would she say things about me to him! LOL! Dreams, weird.

Okay, end of updates, please remind me not sleep anymore!!!

Work hard!!!

Oh, Happy Belated 2009

It's 2009, not Happy 2009, I mean it's Belated 2009, not Happy Belated 2009.

Sleeping loads so that my mind is occupied with dreams and not thoughts.

I dreamt that I scolded people for making lots of noise while I was sleeping. Yeah, I don't like people to make a lot of noise and I don't like the lights on when I am sleeping. And I have a terrible temper if people disturb my sleep.

ROAR. It's complicated, the story of A, B, C and it's time to include a D.

Cockroach Attack!

I saw a cockroach crawling on a wire and I dreamt of roaches! I sort of needed to feed a cockroach with the food provided in the pet shop. I HATE roaches!

Okay, maybe I am an erratic fellow.

The problem lies in the stride.

曲名: 稻香 歌手: 周杰伦 专辑: 魔杰座 词: 周杰伦 曲: 周杰伦

对这个世界如果你有太多的抱怨 跌倒了就不敢继续往前走 为什麽人要这麽的脆弱堕落 请你打开电视看看多少人 为生命在努力勇敢的走下去 我们是不是该知足 珍惜一切 就算没有拥有 还记得你说家是唯一的城堡 随着稻香河流继续奔跑 微微笑 小时候的梦我知道 不要哭让萤火虫带着你逃跑 乡间的歌谣永远的依靠 回家吧 回到最初的美好 不要这麽容易就想放弃 就像我说的追不到的梦想 换个梦不就得了 为自己的人生鲜艳上色 先把爱涂上喜欢的颜色 笑一个吧 功成名就不是目的 让自己快乐快乐这才叫做意义 童年的纸飞机 现在终於飞回我手里 所谓的那快乐 赤脚在田里追蜻蜓追到累了 偷摘水果被蜜蜂给叮到怕了 谁在偷笑呢 我靠着稻草人吹着风唱着歌睡着了 哦 哦 午后吉它在虫鸣中更清脆 哦 哦 阳光洒在路上就不怕心碎 珍惜一切 就算没有拥有 还记得你说家是唯一的城堡 随着稻香河流继续奔跑 微微笑 小时候的梦我知道 不要哭让萤火虫带着你逃跑 乡间的歌谣永远的依靠 回家吧 回到最初的美好 还记得你说家是唯一的城堡 随着稻香河流继续奔跑 微微笑 小时候的梦我知道 不要哭让萤火虫带着你逃跑 乡间的歌谣永远的依靠 回家吧 回到最初的美好 所谓的那快乐 赤脚在田里追蜻蜓追到累了 偷摘水果被蜜蜂给叮到怕了 谁在偷笑呢 我靠着稻草人吹着风唱着歌睡着了 哦 哦 午后吉它在虫鸣中更清脆 哦 哦 阳光洒在路上就不怕心碎 珍惜一切 就算没有拥有 还记得你说家是唯一的城堡 随着稻香河流继续奔跑 微微笑 小时候的梦我知道 不要哭让萤火虫带着你逃跑 乡间的歌谣永远的依靠 回家吧 回到最初的美好搜狗音乐出品

Don't Antagonise Me

I took a nap and nearly could not wake up. In the dream state, I could not open my eyes for a long time, they will close back. Not the first time I have such weird dreams. I tried to shake myself awake but to no avail too. Maybe I was too traumatised in the afternoon.

Yes, I am a very proud person, don't hit too hard on my ego. You'll pay.

Mini surprises are always heartening. Log book and bicycle.

Who Are You?

In total, I think I have dreamt of 7 strangers, 2 female, 5 male. And yestersday's was the most power, this person actually came up to me and talked to me, asked this and that but I don't know the person at all.

I decide to label my blog posts, from Day 1 till now. Let me see if I can do it.

Strangers

Who are those people? Why do I dream of people whom I've never seen in my life before and remember their faces clearly after I wake up? Who are they? They are on friendly terms with me in the dream but I really don't know who they are, even in the dream. I've no idea how I came up with the facial features and all.

Less than 24 hours later is EE2011 and EC1301 tests. Good luck!

曲名: 神秘嘉宾 歌手: 林宥嘉 专辑: 神秘嘉宾 作词: 陈信延 作曲: 郑楠

我踩着梦的阶梯 走进了 一座迷雾森林 谁的心事 被天使窃听 泛起涟漪 时间它帮我设计 下一秒 谁是神秘嘉宾 小心翼翼 揭开了面具 掌声鼓励 谁闯进我的场地 谁让我措手不及 我早就预备的剧情 妳却给我一笔 狡猾地 致命地正中我红心 我跟谁变得亲密 谁逐渐离我远去 华丽演出共襄盛举 唯有妳的背影 友情客串却留下刻骨铭心 的回忆 妳按了我的门铃 我终于 从呵欠中苏醒 紧张兮兮 对妳说一句 欢迎光临 全场观众都离席 剩下我 还在原地寻觅 耳边听着 谢幕的歌曲 走不出去 谁闯进我的场地 谁让我措手不及 我早就预备的剧情 妳却给我一笔 狡猾地 致命地正中我红心 我跟谁变得亲密 谁逐渐离我远 去华丽演出共襄盛举 唯有妳的背影 友情客串却留下刻骨铭心 的回忆 我搬到谁的隔壁 谁成了我的邻居 鸣谢生命有妳参与 笑纳我的邀请 曲终人散却写下不会结束 的结局

不, 完美

Wake up, you Virgo! There is no such thing as perfection, so stop being an obstinate mule thinking things will go your perfect way! Perfectionist, impossible!

Yeah, of course I know this world isn't perfect. And of course I know I am not perfect but still, can't I keep my faith of being a perfectionist?

When I was taking a nap just now, I dreamt of something quite weird. Who was that? I have never seen this person in my life before, how did I manage to come up with the looks and dream of it? And this person in the dream didn't seem perfect also.

曲名: 不, 完美 歌手: 李玖哲 专辑: 不, 完美 作曲: 李玖哲 作词: 林燕岑

你常常说 我很完美 没人能取代 我给的一切 我就以为 我努力更完美 我们就会永远 完美并不美 我们多虚伪 你让我的好 变成一种罪 完美并不美 当你爱了谁 我的完美也只是 不完美 后来你说 我太完美 值得更好的 陪在我身边 你不是我 你怎么能体会 你有多么珍贵 完美并不美 我们多虚伪 你让我的好 变成一种罪 完美并不美 当你爱了谁 我的完美也只是 不完美 完美并不美 我们多虚伪 你让我的好 变成一种罪 完美并不美 当你爱了谁 我的完美成了罪 完美并不美 我们多虚伪 你让我的好 变成一种罪 完美并不美 当你爱了谁 我的完美也只是 不完美

Nightmare

I was only taking a nap when I had a terrible nightmare which I vividly remember after I woke. This was how it went. I was walking in the opposite direction to the traffic flow down the flyover linking Singapore Polytechnic and the road towards NUS with two other friends. I know these two other friends would like to stay low-profile, so I shall not mention their names.

As we walked down the road, there was this scary funeral procession led by a Taoist priest in yellow robes. He was ringing a bell and it seemed as though it was a live presentation of those processions where priests led a line of zombies behind them. What followed next was a scarier sight, four men were carrying an old, traditional coffin you usually see in Hong Kong series, raised using levers. The descendents following behind were dressed in modern clothes which looked like a paradox with the conventional procession.

In fact, there wasn't really a thing that was actually freaking me out. It was the overwhelming aura of death and tradition that made things appear so frightening. I was surprised in the dream, when in face with such an ordeal, I remembered that I had to chant and in fact, I chanted the Manjusri Mantra "Om A Ra Pa Cha Na Dhīh" continuously and that calmed my nerves very much. For some reason, I knew I would be protected by Manjusri.

I think the reason why I had such a nightmare despite it being only a nap is because of the latest hottest topic of town. This topic has stirred many thoughts and I am glad it actually reinforced my thinking and faith. Another plausible reason for this incredible nightmare was because of the many accidents I hear of on the roads and of course, because I saw an ambulance rushing off the same road yesterday morning.

And a run after that clears up my mind again.

曲名: I Have A Dream 歌手: 李玟 专辑: I Have A Dream

我梦见你 在未来某一天的你 白发依稀 微笑的唇还如往昔 看你的手 虽然皱纹已清晰 牵手的劲 依然像昨日般力气 梦见自己 我看到从前的自己 有些任性 只因当时身边有你 离开你 若干年后才明白 真爱难觅 In my dream 最后我们会重遇 我的手 停泊在你的手心 不再逃离 直到世界停止了四季 我愿意 I have a dream I have a dream 在你怀中慢慢清醒 每个夜里 看着你轻轻睡去 风再乱 我们牵着手而行 永不弃 永不离 In my dream 最后我们会重遇 我的手 停泊在你的手心 不再逃离 直到世界停止了四季 我愿意 这世界 越来越多 坏的消息 是非曲直的议题 让人已忘记 也只有爱 可以抵抗黑白蓝绿 In my dream 最后我们会再重遇 我的手 停泊在你的手心 我不再逃离 一直到世界停止了四季 我愿意 In my dream 我们注定要再相遇 而风和雨 将在你和我的爱里得到平息 天知道我到底有多爱你 我爱你

愚人节快乐

梦境是个很奇妙的世界, 有时仿佛就像是把我们带到自己想要去的地方, 有时却很无情的把我们丢在恐怖的险境中. 昨天晚上的梦真的很奇怪, 又是同一个人, 这个人突然要去跑步. 我从来都没有听说这个人有跑步的习惯, 突然间在梦中跟我说要去跑步. 真是一个令人匪夷所思的梦.

我突然有睡觉的动力. 睡觉也需要动力的吗? 不是能够睡觉就是一种福分了吗? 怎么还需要动力? 找到动力就好, 谁管你啊. 动力如以下:

歌曲: 婉君表妹 歌手: 张峰奇 专辑: 婉君表妹

常常在梦里都期待再和你相遇 每次都想要偷偷把你小手牵起 决定不隐藏红色真心紫色秘密 坦白我注意你可爱的一言一行 想问问你给个机会可不可以就让我们的心连系 婉君表妹请答应 先从头培养感情也没关系 婉君表妹请相信 粉红色甜美芭比梦幻般如你我是真心喜欢你 婉君表妹别怀疑痴心绝对如家铭不用考虑 婉君表妹请相信肺腑之言不恶心只为你着迷给我机会照顾你

愚人节快乐.

Give And Take

People cannot just keep expecting others to give when they themselves just happily enjoy taking. Because life doesn’t work this way. It’s a give and take system, sometimes we’ll all have to give and sometimes we’ll all need to take.

I haven’t been listening to the radio because I am always away from home and today, I finally listened to the radio again. There was this very hilarious caller who shared her love story, how she confessed to a guy. I was wondering if girls these days are really so outspoken and forthright in expressing their love until Mummy said, “If you see Xue Gongcan, I believe you will do the same.”

That day I was just telling people I once had a leg cramp while sleeping and the very night, my right leg suffered a cramp. I’d rather dream of the same person than get a leg cramp because it’s really painful.

Life Made Simple goes like this
Sunshine and love be with you
In rainy days, I shall be with you
I’d always be with you

Somebody saw and responded.

"Do you love me more than these?" says:
Love is no fool
Dreams come true

It’s brimming and overflowing in me.

Randomness Using srand

I have been asking people random questions, like

Do you consider the food in your house kitchen free?
Would you rather a bouquet of flowers that costs $100 or just the hard cash of $100?
Would you take up an overseas stint for 8000 Euros a month at the tender age of 18?

Yes, they are very random but they are based on true life experiences and stories. Whoever needs a dose of randomness can come look for me, I shall try my best to lame you around.

I am burdened by another thing I have to keep mum about, wonder why people trust me. I shall spill the beans if they were to turn their backs on me one day. I am a vengeful ghost. Oh well, if I gave you my word, I won’t tell, I would probably just threaten.

And I managed to curb a weird feeling so much so I believe I won’t have weird dreams anymore.
Very hard, it’s very hard, so hard even diamond can’t scratch it. Many things are hard. The most being fathoming the unpredictability of life, the irregularity of people’s thoughts and words and the inconsistency of what has happened versus what is going to happen.

This is a blog of insights of life because I have been thinking about life. Hey I am turning 20 this September, Okay. Some people just have to think short people cannot be philosophical or worse, have childish thinking. I admit I have Schizophrenia. But just wait, one day I shall pounce goody-goody pep talks on you.

Of Secrets, Digging, Uncles and Aunties.

Is that a secret as well? Why are there so many secrets going around and ultimately coming into my ears? I have some little secrets too but they aren’t as big-scale as these. More and more secrets unveiled since last year and more and more added this year. Really, I am very bad at keeping them, but if I have promised to, I will. And if I were to sacrifice like Dumbledore, I am very sure the secret of 12 Grimmauld Place will be very much diluted.

I am extremely good at digging information, people tell me a whole lot of their on-goings. Willingly, not unwillingly, not under coercion, not under induction, just simply out of nowhere. I look as if I am always there to lend a listening ear, I look as if I am always full of advice on all kinds of matter, I look as if I am always trustable and reliable. As if. I thought I have a poor reputation for things like that. Tell at your own risk! If you’ve said not to tell, I probably won’t tell anyone you know. If you’re my family and said not to tell, you can rest assured your secret is carried to my grave. If you didn’t say not to tell and I deem it as a secret, I might tell someone you don’t know, just to get it off my chest. And the default case is, SPREAD LIKE WILD FIRE!

Yeah, I told Hui Fang my address here. So now I cannot talk bad about her. No, of course not, I shall continue to. I haven’t said a single bad thing about her. She is very smart, she says the avoidance of pronouns indicates something.

Jonathan says if one keeps dreaming about a person, the person must be important. I hope I can keep dreaming about Xue Gongcan and not some other-random-brain-space-wasting person.

Today, I took MRT back with Lam Lam and the A1 bus uncle remembers me! He was the same one who spoke to me when I carried a printer up his bus the last time! He even asked the other passengers not to board the bus first as I was alighting. I am so happy this uncle hasn’t forgotten me. I hope the Chinese-teaching uncles in Fengshan Primary School will remember me too, they were all so nice to me. I knew it, I can click better with uncles than aunties. The only aunties I can click with are Mummy, and her so-called my-half-Moms. But they are the ones who saw me grow up and gave me lots of support. But so many uncles can talk so much with me. English-speaking aunties and Mandarin-speaking uncles rock!

Read me like a storybook. Next time I shall try posting in Romanized Hokkien, just for the fun of it. Test if anyone other than Anyone can read. Anyone is better off dead at this point in time.

I like to post at 12.09 am, 12.09 pm, 9.12 am or 9.12 pm if possible. Basically because I love myself too much.

Direct in Pin-Pointing Faults

The higher your expectations of somebody are, the greater your disappointment of this person will be. I was still hoping that one of my Ethelonther V group members would be only joking in jest that he would not partake any work in the camp, only to realize he really meant his heck-care attitude and could not be bothered with most things. He said he didn’t care if he irks anyone and nothing done or said to him can break his nonchalant attitude. I have worked with him previously during Shrek Camp and it did not occur to me he was like that at all. That was why I had an impression that he was responsible to his assigned tasks. To me, it wasn’t a simple case of nonchalant attitude, it was a case of lack of responsibility carried too far. My character is already very flawed and here is a person with worse character than me. As a D personality person, (I don't need you to keep emphasizing that, I know it myself) I am very direct in pin-pointing fauts. Seriously, I wonder how I am going to survive being Key Councilor.

Things said in jest. I have done that and received a whole basket full of that. I’m not stopping so if everyone is continuing, we’ll play as things get along.

This blog has no photos, and there won’t be any because the owner doesn’t like facing the camera. Boring words without visual or audio aid.

Good night. Dream not, because it wastes brain space.

明天会不会更好

为什么会是这样的? 为什么? 好郁闷, 好无奈, 好苦. 原来到头来还是得为了以往的过错作补偿, 原来到头来还是不能一笔勾销, 原来是这样. 那我明白了, 谢谢.

昨晚是我唯一有睡饱八小时的一天. 但是做了怪怪的梦, 扰乱了睡眠. 回家睡觉, 不知道明天会不会更好.

Done = True

I am so going to write ten or more paragraphs today. I have so much to say, all suppressed under the Mid-Terms stress.

I shall start with Mid-Terms. I HATE MID-TERMS! My Math was horribly done, my physics was screwed up, my MLE isn't any better either and my CS, needless to say more. Why after all, I still cannot live up to the expectations? Why is my life so unpredictable? I am so saddened by this tragedic Mid-Terms.

Okay, now I am going to start some incessant ranting. Raj says I know how to take care of people but since when? I cannot even take care of myself and I definitely need others to take care of me. So don't try to ask me to take care of anybody or anything, lest you might just be anticipating an early death.

I think Heaven is mostly fair and at times unfair. Fair in the sense talents are evenly distributed. If you're good at academics, you are probably not nice-looking. If you're nice-looking, you may not have a pleasant character. If you have a pleasant character, you may not have a voice for singing. And if you have a voice for singing, you may not be wise enough to make use of it. The list goes on and on. That's why in certain aspects, Heaven is fair. But how about Heaven being unfair? Let's see, some people are born more blessed than others, in terms of brains or wealth. Sometimes, it takes a great deal for these more blessed people to understand how others are struggling with life. I know of people who have nicely planned lives since they were born and have not met any trouble since then. However, the point is, they cannot seem to put themselves in the shoes of others and seriously, their behaviour really puts me off. Be more selfless, the Earth doesn't revolve around you and it won't kill for you to share.

Friendship is fragile. I believe in that. And the worst people around whom I really cannot accept are those who are so proud of the things they own and start showing off. Honestly, what's wrong with them? I am definitely not impressed by anyone who boasts and tries to get the envy of people. You don't need a Mom who can bake a humble pie for you to eat before you know how to shut up about yourself. So people, don't ever give a I-am-WOW-ed-by-your-new-stuff expression to these people, they don't deserve it.

And since friendship is fragile, I don't want to go beat about the bush. I give many hints on a failing friendship. If people cannot catch them, then look forward to a downslope friendship. I won't try to save it, they have to.

Jonathan went telling people I am emo(emotional). He doesn't even know where I do my real emo stuff at. And he hasn't seen the real emo part of me. So he had better not to make such a hasty conclusion about me again.

Horoscopes is a very real thing. People should try to match their horoscopes for relationships, be it even friendship. Because big time clashes are bound to happen and it's not a simple issue to resolve especially if horoscopes are involved.

I dreamt of the same person again as I have posted previously, the very next night. Consecutively two nights in a row. I don't know what to say, the second dream was just as weird. I was talking on MSN with this person and at the same time e-mailing the same person. I mean most people will just settle all to be discussed over MSN. Who is the right frame of mind will send e-mail and talk on MSN at the same time?

I am posting the next in a jiffy, ten paragraphs done. And I shall return a true.

In The Midst of Mid-Terms

Yeah one Mid-Term test down, that is MLE1101. And for goodness sake, it is 35% of the finals! I decided that I shall put up something small here since I have cleared a pathetic quarter of my Mid-Terms.

So a sneak of what has been going around. I had a very weird dream yesterday, of someone who has been absent in my life. Maybe I have been thinking too much, thus the appearance of this person in my dream. Maybe this person should just be removed from the limited storage space in my brain so that I can fill in more information about Physics, MLE, Math, CS or CTW.

And I did not go for the lunch outing organised by Jeremy and Weiliang last Tuesday. Hardly any reason why but I must say I was needed at home. Guess what, my Primary 5 sister is learning stuff so difficult I feel is robbing her of her childhood. I certainly have no impression of memorising things like "Binary Fission", "Cell Division" and "Budding" in Primary 5. And the moon phases, I can't even interpret it now if you were to give me the moon phase chart. Amazing how she can use an electronic Chinese dictionary for Chinese compositions and a scientific calculator for Paper 2 of her Mathematics examination. Sometimes, schools progress so quickly if we're going any slower, when we'll be going backwards. And yeah, I felt the need to stay home because CA is really stressful!

Actually I have more to say, but I have no time! Mummy's really a cool dude, she said, "Ciao" to me yesterday.

Ciao. Till the end of Mid-Terms.